"Yesterday, upon the stair,
I met a man who wasn't there.
He wasn't there again today,
I wish, I wish he'd go away.
When I came home last night at three,
The man was waiting there for me
But when I looked around the hall,
I couldn't see him there at all!"
~Hughes Mearns (1875–1965), "Antigonish," Psyco-ed, c.1899
'You're so sensitive' or 'You're too sensitive' are phrases I have heard my entire life. As a child these words were told to me on a regular basis- usually when I was upset for no reason that the adults in my life could figure out.
As a very young child I didn't possess the verbal skills to explain why a certain room scared me or why I was afraid of being alone in the dark. At 5 years old trying to explain to adults why another adult was 'bad' or 'wrong' became nearly impossible in a 1970's military family because children simply did not speak out in such a manner even though adults did routinely ask what was the matter with me. For the record, to my knowledge I was not every physically abused by an adult as a child. However, I was able to very keenly become aware of an adult's vibrations and intentions. A kindergartner who *knows* that the teacher has just lied or that the neighbor doesn't like your family is left in a frustrating no-win situation when asked what is the matter. Of course that type of *knowing* is nothing compared to knowing that the man you see standing next to your father cannot be seen by anyone else or that the Cavalry Horses prancing in the parade on the military base are not seen by the other parade viewers lining the sidewalks. Suffice it to say that as a very young child I was continually bombarded with visual and verbal stimuli that the adults in my world were unable to see or hear for themselves. This left me feeling very much alone and very insecure most of the time.
About the Cavalry Horses
When I was very young - about 3 years old- my family was stationed at the military base in Cheyenne, Wyoming - F.E. Warren. FE Warren is a very old installation located on the branch of the South Platte River, three miles west of what is today Cheyenne and originally named Fort D. A. Russell -it was established in 1867. Originally named in honor of Civil War Brigadier General David A. Russell, F. E. Warren Air Force Base is the oldest continuously active military installation within the Air Force. Without going into huge amounts of High Plains and Western Expansion US history the short version is that Fort Russell housed military Cavalry units which participated in everything from General Custer's defeat, protecting railways moving westward and the continual attempts to coral and put down indigenous people, control their lands and destroy their ways of life in order for the US to move westward in its campaign of 'Manifest Destiny'.
The base has maintained its historic outward appearance and was listed on the Register of Historic Places in 1975 - 3 years or so after my family left that area.
The maintaining of an area's or building's historical integrity is important when it comes to paranormal activity and is something that has taken me awhile to catch on to. Of course I knew nothing of this at 3 years old. What I did know was that the beautiful horses and smartly uniformed men leading the other parade members seemed absolutely solid and most decidedly 'there'.
I could hear the horses hooves clip-clopping along the road and the soldiers in their unusual uniforms 'tshking' and otherwise muttering corrections and encouragements to them. Right on the heals of the group of soldiers on horseback came groups more easily recognized with more modern uniforms and motor vehicles. My recollections of the 'real' members of the parade are hazy though my mental image of the Cavalry is still sharp and colorful. Also clear in my memory was that no one else reacted to that first group- no cheers, no flag waving, no applause.
This is my first clear memory of seeing and experiencing something that others around me seemed oblivious to. I don't remember if I mentioned the Cavalry group to my mother or not.
I've often wondered if those soldiers continue to parade on the base and if anyone else has seen them.
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